Have you noticed that trauma seems to be a word that’s everywhere these days. Trauma informed sessions, trauma breath work, trauma yoga,
Trauma definitely seems to be high on the agenda. Gabor Mate’s work has been especially important at putting trauma on the map and redefining the way we understand it. The basic premise is that childhood trauma is the root of much of our later adult issues with addictive behaviour and mental health. There’s even the suggestion that ADHD, bipolar, developmental delay, even psychosis and a myriad of physical conditions have trauma as the underlying cause.
On a personal level I’ve always veered towards the love and light, raise your vibration and focus on the positive. I still fundamentally believe that approach, combined with developing gratitude is a key component for a happy and fulfilled life. But we are all human, we have all been through stuff and sometimes we just need a helping hand to deal with that and get back on track, right? So in my work I want to make sure I’m equipped to steer my clients through and have the skills to help them heal. That’s why I’ve been spending time on a groundbreaking course combining NLP with psychotherapy techniques specifically for processing simple and complex trauma.
It’s been emotional and illuminating all round - firstly in the learning of the new techniques, but with the added bonus of getting some of my own stuff cleared. I don’t know about you, but I have a certain desire to feel like I’ve done a lot of the work, or if I’m being really honest, that I have an egoic thought that I don’t want to be defined as someone with trauma - but this week it popped right up, loud and clear and thankfully I was in the right place and loving hands to help guide me through it. And I know already that I’ll be so much the better for it….
So how do we actually know if trauma has played a role in our life?
It’s clinically defined as the act of observing death or threat of death. Our minds instantly go to war veterans and those who have been unlucky enough to witness terrible accidents and tragedy. But in actual fact the definition is much more far reaching. Trauma can come in many forms. The death of self, through neglect, emotional harm, bullying, sexual abuse, overly controlling or critical parents. Or parents that didn’t have boundaries. A situation that brings sudden overwhelming fear or grief. All of these can evoke a trauma response. A good adage is “trauma isn’t what happens to us, it’s what happens inside of us in response to what happened to us’ No two people will react in the same way, so this is a very personal journey.
How does trauma show up in our life ?
As children we don’t have ways of processing those difficult events, so they often remain buried; stored as memories within the body. Sometimes, in the case of simple trauma, time and love can heal and ease these memories. But as adults they can show up in all kinds of ways in our lives.
Need to control situations and others
Negative self talk
Stuck in stress response
Never feeling whole or complete
Learning / developmental delay
So what to do if I feel that trauma might be effecting me?
Self realisation is a great place to start. Lifting the veil and starting to see what lives in the unconscious already starts to bring it into the light and the healing space. You may want to just spend time with that and observe it. You may feel drawn to develop your spiritual practice and go deeper into your self awareness through journaling, uplifting music, yoga, breathwork, getting out into nature. All these activities feed us. Meditation can be helpful, but for those with significant trauma it can be very difficult to quiet the mind and can sometimes trigger the trauma response, so go gently. Sound healing can calm your mind and body and can facilitate energetic release.
In Shamanic terms, trauma is accompanied by soul loss. Part of the soul that fragments when events are too traumatic, resulting in that sense of never feeling complete in oneself. So soul retrieval is a powerful tool for facilitating that healing.
Choose something that feels like a starting place, but above all start and talk to people around you. You are too precious to let trauma steal your joy. And if you are looking for some more specific support to heal your trauma memories and related issues and would like to talk that through with me, please reach out.
Here’s to becoming whole 💜